Hearing that your girlfriend is pregnant changes everything! Fear and worry immediately raise their ugly heads. At points like this, it’s easy to want to run and distance yourself just as far as possible from the entire situation. However, if you’re reading this, continue reading to see how you can find peace and work through this situation.
First off, you matter to your girlfriend. She needs you right now. You were a team creating an unplanned pregnancy. Why not be a team deciding your baby’s future?
You might hear people say “this is her decision.” While ultimately that is true, this is a decision that will affect both of you.
There are some ways you can come alongside your girlfriend.
- Listen to her. She could be really scared right now. She probably needs a listening ear and expressions of love and concern. Let her share her feelings.
- Offer to go along with her to any prenatal appointments.
- Learn about your options. Although she’s the one that’s pregnant, your thoughts matter.
- Talk to her. Tell her what you were first thinking when she shared with you, then tell her your advice and how you came to that opinion.
- Remind her how important she is to you and how much you love her. Stay committed to her and walk this journey with her.
- Explore your options together and make sure to get help from people who care about both of you.
Finding out your girlfriend is pregnant is life-changing news. No matter what she decides, the outcome will always be with you. Look at all the options and evaluate the results of each. You can take responsibility for this pregnancy. Both of you are now parents.
Learn what’s happening inside her body. From the moment of conception, a unique person has been developed. Your baby’s DNA and forty-six chromosomes have already determined her sex, eye and hair color, and even personality!1 In addition, only 22 days after conception, her heart has started beating,2 and at just 8 weeks your baby has arms and legs!3
What if you don’t want to keep the baby?
You might be saying, wait a minute…what if I don’t want to keep the baby? You have some options.
Scott found out his girlfriend was pregnant thirty-nine years ago. She told him their options, and the only way he saw possible was an abortion. It was a way to cover up the mistake and move on in life. It was the easiest way. He wasn’t ready to be a father.
Thirty-nine years later, he has still not escaped the guilt and pain of that decision. He thinks often about the woman he got pregnant and the son or daughter he encouraged her to abort. Further, he can’t help but wonder about the grandchildren he should be holding today. He said, “Tell people about the consequences. Warn our young men—tell them God will hold them accountable for what they do with their children.” Then he broke down in tears and said, “I don’t want our young men to do what I did thirty-nine years ago.”
He’s not the only man who’s said this. There are many more guys who have similar feelings. Abortion doesn’t just affect her. It affects everyone.
Do whatever you need to do to support her when you find out your girlfriend is pregnant. Be the man to stand up and protect her and your baby. She’s probably facing a lot of pressure and fears. Reassure her, and do whatever you need to do to help her make the best decision possible for her and your baby.
Be the man to stand up and protect her and your baby.
We suggest you take that next step of accompanying your girlfriend to a care center. They will help you sort out the best decision to make given your situation.
- https://www.parents.com/advice/pregnancy-birth/pregnancy-stages/when-will-i-see-my-babys-heartbeat-on-an-ultrasound/ and http://www.ehd.org/dev_article_unit4.php