If you’re not facing an unplanned pregnancy, but you know someone who is, this article is for you! Friends can either be a great support, or they can be a source of frustration and discouragement. Whether you have a friend who’s pregnant right now, or one who might be in the future, here are some thoughts to help you navigate your interactions with her and provide her with much-needed support and strength.
1. Give Her Time
First of all, don’t rush, pressure, or judge her. She’ll probably get enough of that from everyone else! She’s likely going to need some time to process the reality of the situation, accept the fact that she might be pregnant, and begin to think about her options. Since getting pregnant wasn’t something she had envisioned at this time in her life, it may feel like she’s starting from scratch trying to figure out what to do about it. Encourage her to take all the time she needs to make an informed, confident decision, and not to allow panic or fear to dictate her choice.
2. Come Alongside Her
A good step that you can take to help her out and show support would be to go with her to get her pregnancy confirmed. Missing a period, feeling nauseous, or even getting a positive home pregnancy test isn’t enough to confirm a viable pregnancy. Find a safe, neutral place that will give her a laboratory quality pregnancy test and an early pregnancy ultrasound to determine if her pregnancy is viable.
Since miscarriages are common in the first trimester of pregnancy,1 it’s important for her to know if her pregnancy is showing any signs of viability, or if it’s naturally terminating on its own. Many pregnancy care centers offer these services free of charge and can also provide information on all of the options she has available to her. Here you can find a care center that is close to you.
3. Be There for Her
Once she has confirmed her pregnancy is viable, you can be a great resource for her as she works through all the information she’s gathered and begins to make her decision. Listen to her share. Talk pros and cons with her. Be a safe place for her to think through her options. Cry with her, pray for her, and remind her that you’ll be there for her, no matter what.
Be a safe place for her to think through her options.
Your Help Matters
She needs your friendship and support more than ever, and you may be the only friend she can count on for help during this unplanned pregnancy. Even though it’s not an easy situation to involve yourself in, show you care for her by walking alongside her in this journey and gently, lovingly pointing her in the right direction.